Self-Confidence is the key ingredient to have a successful life. Everybody admires a confident person with their ability to perform any task with ease and their “Can Do” attitude.
This quality can help anyone in almost all aspects of one’s life whether it’s a relationship, job interview or debate competition.
Given the importance of this quality, it’s something everyone should possess, but unfortunately, that’s not the case. Even two people ideally living in the same condition might showcase different levels of Self-Confidence, but why so? Short answer: “It’s just a matter of believing yourself”.
Just to be on the same page I would like to mention two things:
First: Self-Confidence is not something we are born with.
Second: It’s possible to gain Self-Confidence no matter what.
WHAT’S IN IT
What is Self-Confidence?
As per the Psychology Wiki “Self-Confidence is defined as an attitude which allows individuals to have positive yet realistic views of themselves and their situations.”
Self-confident people trust their abilities, have a general sense of control in their lives, and believe that, within reason. They will be able to do what they wish, plan, and expect. Now it’s not a static measure, but a variable one. That is our confidence level to interact with different tasks and people varies from situation to situation.
For example, one might be comfortable giving a speech to 10-15 people but would find it hard to handle 100 people. Also, it’s very much possible that one day you feel very confident in your abilities and the very next day you feel low. It’s like the saying goes “Not every day is a good day”.
So far we have established how Self-Confidence is fruitful, but there is one catch. There are different states of confidence which one should take into notice. Low Self-Confidence is a no, no, but at the same time, Overconfidence is not going to do you any good too. Let’s see how these two different states look like.
Low Confidence
It’s a result of many factors including fear, low self-esteem, poor management etc. This state of mind is such when we believe in what others think about us even if they are far from being right.
Self-doubt starts growing in such people and soon they start running away from their tasks and responsibilities. Even if such a person accomplishes something he/she won’t feel happy about it.
Overconfidence
People under this appear to be narcissistic and egoistic to others. Such a person neglecting the realistic approach of confidence believes that he/she can do anything. Anything without even having the basic skills and knowledge necessary.
Characteristics of a Self-confident Person
There’s more to a Self-Confident person than just being a successful individual. Contrary to the general belief, the Self-Confident loses too, but when they lose they take their failure in a positive manner and an opportunity to grow. Let’s see the other indicators which talk about a confident person:
- They do what is right and the goals they have worked hard for. They don’t let the negativity and criticism from outside deviate them from their goal.
- Bragging and Boasting is not their cup of tea.
- They admit when it’s their mistake instead of covering it up and arguing about it. They see their failure and mistake as a learning experience.
- Such a person is always ready to put in the extra work whenever required to accomplish the target.
How to Build Self-confidence?
Pretty sure that after reading how a self-confident person behaves and how this quality helps to accomplish one’s goals. Everybody would like to be a confident person. Here I will talk about some simple steps you can take to prepare yourself for success.
Let me remind you that it’s a long term process. It’s not like that you will start applying these principles in your life one day. And will wake up oozing out with self-confidence the next day. This process may take months or years in some cases. During this journey, you will encounter the benefits of this exercise at different points of your life. This in turn will motivate you to keep on moving forward.
Let’s now move ahead see some of the steps which will help you in building self-confidence.
1) Forethought Thinking
It means thinking or planning out in advance. Whenever we are about to do something new we feel less confident as compared to work we have experience with.
Let’s take an exmaple you’re going for an interview for an internship at a company. Now apart from focusing on your resume, just pay a little bit of attention to what you are about to wear. Iron your clothes a day before and check if your vehicle is in good condition.
Just try to avoid an unwanted surprise. Also, there is no harm in having a plan B.
2) Take Risks
Whenever there is a new opportunity knocking at your door, don’t say no. Just take it with open arms. Use the opportunity as a learning experience instead of making about a win or lose situation.
It’s better to fail and learn something than saying no and learn nothing. Not opening up to new tasks for a longer time will create unnecessary fear of failure.
3) Celebrate small achievements
Progress is progress no matter how small. Sometimes we focus too much on the bigger picture. So much so that we completely forget to celebrate those little achievements which we are building blocks for the bigger picture.
Pat yourself on the back whenever you achieve success. No matter if it’s a big win or small.
4) Create a Positive Environment
Be in the company of people who believe in your ability. Also, those who encourage you to accomplish your goals. Positive vibes from people around you will affect you. Now the positive environment is not only limited to people.
The same applies to your workplace, kitchen, bedroom etc. A messy bedroom will already occupy some unnecessary space in your mind. Talking about the workplace, stick a motivational quote. You can do this every week or have a small plant at your desk.
5) Avoid Comparison
Self-Confidence is about ourselves and the prefix is an indicator of that. When we see others winning, meanwhile we are losing. We start comparing ourselves and create a problem. We start seeing ourselves in a negative light. Without even knowing the effort and time the person has put we compare ourselves and ultimately we disappointed.
Conclusion
Self-Confidence is a very crucial part of one’s life. It not only affects our work-related performance but also plays a major role in our relationships. So, if you think you need to work on your Self-Confidence, start working on it asap. It’s like “sooner the better” I am saying this because if you do nothing about it, your confidence level will keep on dropping.
This could be a major concern as dropping confidence will bring in some extra problems in your life, like self-doubt, negativity etc. So just start working on it. Keep in mind that it’s never too late. What you need are patience and practice.
Also you can read our blog on Self Efficacy